Thursday was a momentous day as SMA and I saved the planet, gave to the poor, and developed a marketing campaign for Christianity. We did this all in the process of emptying his storage unit.
We began by taking many, many items to a recycling center. Any time we perform this task, I always have the theme to “Captain Planet” running through my head. We were driving SMA’s father’s truck and had the entire truck bed full of recyclables. The irony of saving the planet whilst driving this gas guzzling monstrosity was not lost on us.
We then went to the Disc Exchange for the second time in a week. We left another substantial box of CDs and went to Comics Exchange and then Goodwill, where SMA donated picture frames. His generosity knows no bounds.
After this dramatic and touching act of charity, we sought a place to eat in the area. We first tried Kay’s Ice Cream. The Chapman Highway branch is now the only location in our area. They advertised a burger, fries, and soda for $3.99. On the door, a sign advertised their bologna sandwich. Any restaurant that pushes a bologna sandwich has to be good. Unfortunately we did not find out as they only accepted cash and I naturally had none and SMA inexplicably did not have any either. SMA was hoping to end a 21 year streak of not eating at the restaurant. We plan to go back on a Sunday where I can actually eat the ice cream and have a coke.
Instead, we went to the Chop House, whose lunch menu was surprisingly affordable. While parking, we resisted the urge to use the big truck as a monster truck by crushing the van below us (see picture for angle). We wondered what the driver would think if someone monster trucked their van for no apparent reason. Yes, monster truck is also a verb.
At the restaurant I questioned the waitress who gave me an option of the booth or table as to why anyone would actually prefer the table. Why would anyone ever pick a table when they could have a booth? What possible advantage is there? Is it an insult to my intelligence that people think I need to be asked if I would want the table? I probably analyzed that way too much...
In area news, the Wal-Mart in the area seems to have been reopened. The parking lot was full. The alternative explanation is that a new business exists in the building and simply kept all of the existing Wal-Mart signs up. I am pretty sure the Wal-Mart is back.
We then went to McKay’s and dropped more boxes of books and CDs. We left and got SMA an allergy shot and cleaned out his storage unit. When we returned, the order was still not complete. For the second time in a week our order was #718. I have no idea why I document that, only that the odds were remarkably low of that occurring.
Among the books he discarded was a paperback copy of Black Elk Speaks. It was the end of an era. Somewhere David Linge shed a tear. (I apologize for the inside joke.)
Now, I know you are thinking - what about the new Christian marketing strategy? While listening to talk radio, we heard a blurb about Sh’Ite Muslims. We began thinking about how many people they recruit just so that they can say that they are Sh’Ites. So we developed a new concept - Biyotch Christians. Does the word “gold” mean anything to you?
After a marathon day of do-gooding with SMA, I helped lead a Bible Study at the church. MLM and I have decided to teach the New Testament book-by-book. We did the gospels on this week. It went well. While there, I got a chance to see the finished product of the new gymnasium floor. It looks good. This picture is of the logo that rests in center court.
Afterwards I ate with my family at Calhoun’s. My father had been in Nashville on business so it was great to have him home.
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