In Eckleburg's Eyes - 6/3/2008

My Monday was spent on two inexplicably long adventures but in the process I visited two new (to me) businesses.

First, I went to McKay Used Books and CDs. I will be the first to admit that it is not that uncommon for me to spend an inordinate amount of time there. This time, however, it was for different reasons than my typical book obsession. SMA sent me with a large order to trade in after cleaning his home. Whenever he discards his old items, I take the items rejected by the higher paying Disc Exchange to McKay’s as SMA has no use for McKay’s credit. It is a good deal as I get a stipend and and a good deal on his unwanted credit.

On this day, the processing took nearly an hour and a half! In addition to the order being substantial, it was the first Monday since school has been out. With the additional time, I checked out sections of the store I usually do not. It was quite educational. I learned that Will Smith’s song “Just the Two Of Us” was also published as a children’s book.

I also investigated (read: stalked) a regular customer. This man shops almost every time I do and I am there a lot. He is conspicuous as he always wears the same shirt and he carries a scanner with which he scans every bar code in the store. I believe that he checks the price and then sells profitable books online. I can see no other reason for this but I could be wrong. Anyway, with a great deal of time to spare I entertained myself by trying to get a good picture of him. This represents my best effort. My stealth photography skills are not improving, I just had more takes at this “assignment.” I am not sure which is weirder - him scanning books daily or me taking pictures of him doing it. I am almost positive it is the latter.

SMA was pleased with his $98. I was given a substantial bonus for handling his stuff for an over and a half (His words, not mine.) For all of those who trade at McKay’s, effective June 1 (Sunday), all trade credit is now yellow, meaning that everything in the store is eligible to be bought with credit with no distinction made as to whether one submitted books or media. Desegregation at last!

I then picked SMA up from his class at the UT law school and we went for lunch. SMA had received great news earlier in the day. He was recognized as a merit scholar for his work in jurisprudence. This meant that he received the highest grade in that particular class. This is the second time he has done so as he also held that distinction in William G. Ross (aka "The Macebearer")’s professional responsibility class. He did lament that these two classes probably have less to do with the law than any others. Congratulations!

Unfortunately, his class was not entertaining. That is an understatement. The UT professor who lectured in person had him longing for the taped segments he had been subjected to during the previous week. He spent much of the class contemplating the etymology of “renege” and considering how much better his professor Brad Bishop will be when he teaches the class.

We then made our way to Chandler’s Deli. This was definitely my choice (I was honestly surprised that he consented to go) and not just because of the great name. I had heard great things about Chandler's and it recently received an award from the readers of the MetroPulse. Regarding its location, I knew only that it was on Magnolia Avenue. This proved problematic as Magnolia is quite a large street and with construction in the area and SMA sedated, we really had no idea how to get there. To say our route was convoluted doesn’t even scratch the surface.

Since we drove past it en route, we stopped by Three Rivers Market, “Knoxville’s Community Food Co-Op.” It has been open since 1981 and provides all of our city’s organic food needs. Despite it having been open most of my life, I had never been there. If you are familiar with Knoxville geography, you can probably tell how disjointed our trip was by this stop alone. And our driving had only just begun.

We drove a great deal down Knoxville’s crowded streets during lunch time and always seemed to end up at the same place. SMA, who was directing acknowledged, “I can get us to Fifth Avenue like nobody’s business.” Unfortunately, as noted, we were looking for Magnolia not Fifth.

Having been in the car seemingly forever, we received many calls en route. The comments by WRK, RLN, and CST were priceless. They all seemed to wonder whether or not we were procuring drugs. To our crew this is the land of Fifth Avenue Baptist Church, one-eyed hookers, and Clyde Barnard. (All of those are stories in and of themselves.)

We did finally find Chandler’s at 3101 E Magnolia Ave. It is located across the street from the Pizza Palace, Knoxville's only drive-in pizza restaurant. The sign outside proudly advertises “bonesucking b.b.q.”

Charles and Gwendolyn Chandler renovated an abandoned Taco Bell (complete with drive-up window) in May 2000. The building is now pastel pink. The Chandlers started contemplating a new career when Charles Chandler thought that he might lose his job as a maintenance mechanic with Martin Marietta during a time when the company had massive layoffs. Although he never lost his job, his wife lost hers. Gwendolyn Chandler was a machine operator at the Levi Strauss plant on Cherry Street until it closed in 1997. After Charles Chandler retired after 30 years, the couple devised the restaurant as it was a business they could operate together.

Chandler’s has a family atmosphere, with no smoking and no alcohol. The owners are clearly Christian. Gospel music from the family's collection plays on the restaurant's sound system, a large poster detailing the names of Jesus adorns a wall, and Matthew 3:17 is posted on their sign. This verse is God’s glowing approval of Jesus at his baptism:

and behold, a voice out of the heavens said, "This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well-pleased." (Matthew 3:17, NASB)

The food is served buffet style and there are plenty of options. We both ate pulled pork sandwiches, as that is clearly their main attraction. They also had fried chicken, rotisserie chicken, ribs, greens, mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, etc. They advertised chitterlings (aka chitlins aka pig intestines aka we did not eat them) and pigs feet as specials. The servings are ample and are served in a styrofoam to go box placed atop an orange tray.

I was most impressed by that fact that they actually had Kool-Aid on tap! It was the best cherry Kool-Aid I have ever had. Though I am typically a grape man and we would have appreciated more options, it was unique.

I liked it fairly well but SMA has been spoiled by the many great barbeque establishments in Birmingham. It was reasonably priced. In fact I am almost positive the gas cost entailed in our tangential route cost more than the food. (Note: The URL featured on the business card is defunct.)

Though the experience was good, SMA summarized the day well: “We have learned one thing today - we have no f’n idea where Magnolia is.” Touché.