In Eckleburg's Eyes - 3/25/2008

Knoxville had its first snow of the spring on Monday and I had my first meeting with JW, associate and interim pastor at the Church at Sterchi Hills. It looked as though the meeting would be postponed as the church was empty when I arrived for my scheduled appointment at 2 pm. I called the church several times and finally heard back around 3. I had stayed in the area and was thus able to meet him when he got there. He explained that he had been looking at books and got delayed. Of all the excuses he could have given me he picked the one that actually endeared him to me.

I was at a nearby Wal Mart when he called and was buying KJW some Imperial Super Miracle bubbles. I had to buy them in bulk and I used an extra bottle as a gift for JW. What minister working with youth cannot use a miracle, much less a super miracle?

JW is a 44-year old local who was educated at Luther Rice Seminary. He worked for the International Mission Board (IMB) for eighteen years, serving as a missionary to the Philippines. A year and a half ago he married a Filipino woman. He soon came home on furlough with every intention of returning to the mission field, but a new IMB policy stated that his wife must be a member of a Southern Baptist Convention (SBC) church for three years before leaving. Despite this inane rule, he is devoted to the SBC and despite our diverse denominational allegiances (though I really have none), I liked him. He was very forthcoming, which I appreciated.

The church is located at 904 Dry Gap Pike, off of the Merchants Drive Exit of I-75. “Sterchi Hills” is named after the family associated with the Sterchi Brothers Furniture Store who once owned all of the land in the area. The name has stuck though there are no longer any Sterchis in the area. In fact, Sterchi Mansion, located across the street from the church, is for sale.

The region could best be described as in the Inskip area, on the edge of Powell. JW told me that locals specify the area over the hill where the church is located as “Dante.” (Pronounced like the name “Dan” and the drink “tea”.) I have lived in Knoxville most of my life and have never heard of that designation. The majority of the youth go to Powell High School with some from Halls and one from Gibbs. Most importantly, one has to pass an Applebees to get to the church.

The church was formed in 1995 after a split from Glenwood Baptist Church. The schism came when the founders of the Church at Sterchi Hills (known within the church as the “Prime Timers”) felt that Glenwood was not modern enough. They have been at their present location since 2003.

They market themselves on their web site and even their church sign, as providing “casual worship.” This picture is of their last senior pastor preaching. JW now handles the preaching duties and uses PowerPoint throughout. They start their services at 10:30 am and are done within an hour. Like any good Baptists, they are proud to beat nearby Faith United Methodist Church to lunch.

They incorporate contemporary music. JW has worked at the church about a year and they have featured three music leaders in that time. The current musician toured with Robert Plant in his band the Honeydrippers before he formed Led Zeppelin.

The church is located in an edifice that looks like a warehouse. The plan is for another similar structure to be built with a more traditional church building connecting the two. There is a painting of the completed building as you enter the church. What is now serving as the sanctuary will one day be a gym.

The church literally owns all of the land as far as the eye can see and are devoted to expansion. They have $600,000 to pay off the present facility before proceeding as planned. Though it is small, JW described them as “givers” and they have the resources to pay both an associate and senior pastor full-time.

The problem with the location is that there is no roadside visibility, though the church sign can be seen from the street. Further, it is in a totally residential area with little through traffic. This means that walk-up attendance will be minimal.

The church has no one on staff that was employed on January 1, 2007. Their beloved senior pastor retired abruptly in December 2006 and moved to Anderson County. A rift was formed in the church when a faction wanted associate RS to be promoted. He and thirty of his family members left in February 2007, which is a huge loss in a church of this size. He now works in McMinn County. Soon after he left, a phone campaign against the church began, including charges as farfetched as pedophilia. JW believes that the church has withstood the attack and has already bottomed out. He is encouraged as Sunday School attendance is back up to 80 with more in worship.

Their primary goal is to reach a burgeoning local community that represents a young demographic. I have some ideas but any suggestions on how to do this would be appreciated.

As of now, this meeting amounts to little more than a fact finding mission. The church has a dozen resumes on file and I have been the first one to tour the church by invitation. This means very little. Keep this process in your prayers, please.

Afterwards, I went to the Post Office to mail “Flat Stanley” to PAT in Kennesaw. Stanley accompanied me to a concert, the SEC Tournament, and the beach. He even survived a tornado so he is more durable than he appears.

While at the Post Office, I paid what Christian financial adviser Dave Ramsey calls the “Stupid Tax.” I picked up an envelope and filled it out so that I would be ready when I got to the front of the line. I did not realize that Express Mail would cost me $16.25! At least, he should be there soon. PAT, be ready.

I spent Monday night watching JTH’s team win a tough 50-47 game in the church league. I was more impressed with a new referee. It was not so much his officiating that I noticed, but his hair. His hair did not move once after refereeing three games! If I had his “preacher hair”, there would be no need to interview for jobs as churches would beat my door down to hire me. Plus, I could enter Jimmy Johnson lookalike contests.

While at the gym, I was also able to demonstrate my stupidity. The referee with less than perfect hair was searching for a needle. I got the keys to the equipment room from JEKGR but returned with no needle. I explained that I could not find one. It was actually a failure to communicate as I was looking for a needle (as in a needle and thread) while they wanted a needle for the basketball pump. At least I did not come back with a hypodermic needle.

Afterwards, I went to see KLTW, KJW, and RAW. KLTW and RAW are off of work through Wednesday to celebrate KLTW’s spring break. They are celebrating by cleaning the house. To give them some time, KJW ate some of my Sonic takeout with me. She enjoyed the mozzarella sticks (fried cheese is just a good idea). She also wanted some of my water. I had to show her that I poured it from my cup into hers to appease her. She is a distrusting little booger...

She also has some new acts in her repertoire. If you say “Sumo,” she squats and moves her leg like a sumo wrestler preparing for battle. My favorite new bit ivolves guns. No, we have not armed a baby. Her father has taught her that biceps are called “guns.” She now flexes while saying “Guns.” It is awesome! (By the way, I bought her the camouflage shirt she is wearing.)