Thursday, March 20, 2008

In Eckleburg's Eyes - 3/20/2008

On Wednesday, JTH, PAT and I embarked on a trip to Charleston. If you thought the trip I made to Atlanta last week (which was interrupted by no less than a tornado) was a fiasco, it had nothing on our Charleston endeavor.

The morning started routinely enough. I accompanied JTH to the Verizon Wireless store so that he could add text messaging to his plan for the sole purpose of texting a specific young lady. Gasoline to the store - $3.14. Five hundred monthly text messages - $10.00. The Verizon saleslady mocking JTH - Priceless.

The visit also proved advantageous as the aforementioned saleslady taught us to use the T9 function on the phone. This program enables the phone to guess the words being typed based upon the letter sequence as opposed to the repeated pressing of individual buttons. Its accuracy is uncanny and the feature will reduce time considerably. This will come in handy both times a year I send a text message.

After one day with text messaging capabilities, I can already predict that 500 monthly messages will not be enough for JTH. (Note the rare stark determination on his face.)

It was while at the Verizon store that we realized the trip would not go according to plan.

PAT originally planned to be in Knoxville by Wednesday morning. Then a meeting was rescheduled for 11 am in Atlanta. It was to last only fifteen minutes. It lasted more than an hour and a half. Then traffic postponed the trip significantly further. To end a painfully long synopsis, PAT did not arrive in Knoxville until after 5. This is why I do not plan trips.

In the meantime, I joined RAW and KJW for lunch. I fed KJW grapes and Doritos. No, this was not all her daddy fed her. She had a sandwich too, but it was too mangled to be of any use by the time I arrived.

I always feel like a bird when I feed her grapes as I eat half and give the other half to her as a whole grape is too large a portion. I have also learned to give her one chip at a time as chips in front of her within her grasp are not near as appetizing as the chips in the bag. I guess even at her age, the grass is greener on the other side.

After the meal she escorted me into the living room to watch a few scenes from Newsies. Why is it that she always wants to hold my hand when hers are disgusting (remember the Doritos)? Though I have never seen it, Newsies must be good as it is the only musical her father tolerates. She seemed to enjoy it too and even applauded some of the musical numbers.

When PAT arrived, we decided to eat with JTH’s girl CB_ and her seven-year old daughter, K at the Great American Steak & Buffet Company. Why rush to Charleston when nothing would be open when we arrived anyway?

The kid was hilarious. The highlight for me came when JTH used his self-deprecating humor by commenting that he looked like a horse. I never know how to respond to such statements. I did not have to as K quickly retorted, “Yeah, you do.” I really hope he was not fishing for compliments...

At JTH’s request I will refrain from posting images of “the family.”

We finally hit the interstate at 7:08 pm. SRM called and when we told him of our itinerary, his response was, “Are you serious?” Yes, we were. I honestly was as shocked as he. We drove to Charleston (12 hours round trip) to essentially spend a day there. It’s not the stupidest thing I have done this month. It is close though.

The trip went smoothly though we encountered intermittent storms throughout. This was Chanana II’s first trek to Charleston and she performed admirably. We also had the rare treat of driving through two tunnels. (I probably ought not take pictures while driving, huh?)

PAT and I had a very meaningful conversation for much of the trip in which much Scripture was referenced and I even broke out my Hebrew. Meanwhile, JTH texted and slept in the back seat. He did chime in once that I would look good in a yarmulke. I have no idea how to take that.

As is JTH’s and my Charleston tradition we played “Under Pressure” by Queen and David Bowie on repeat for over three hours. It never gets old. We also listened to Afroman in homage to MBR and past Charleston trips.

We arrived in Folly Beach at around 1 am and checked into our hotel. We had an oceanfront room at the Charleston on the Beach Holiday Inn. When we got to our room, we were greeted by an incessant beeping noise. Though it was incredibly annoying, it was worth it to see JTH completely enraged. Security handled the issue and discovered the alarm clock next door had been triggered. Since the noise had emanated from the outlet, we originally tried to fix the outlet. Since outlets do not tend to make noise, the alarm clock scenario explained a lot.

JTH was enamored of the workman who defused the clock for the remainder of the night. You may think that would not account for much time but we were wired and up past 3.

We are in Room 528 if you need us. We probably will not be there. It might be best to call my cell phone. I probably won’t answer though. In short, contacting me is pretty much the same as it would be were I home.

Please pray for favorable weather. Charleston is one of mine and JTH’s favorite vacation spots while PAT has never been there. Last year marked the first year since 2000 that I had not made at least one trip to Charleston. We are hoping for good weather to best show PAT “our” fair city.

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